Monday, September 08, 2008

I don't normally post Internet things like this...

...but I am so frustrated about this election that I just couldn't resist.

The Rules of the 2008 Election

If you're a minority and you're selected for a job over more qualified candidates you're a "token hire."
If you're a conservative and you're selected for a job over more qualified candidates you're a "game changer."

-------

If you're a Democrat who has been in the Senate for thee years, you are a Washington "insider".
If you're a Republican who has been in the Senate for 26 years, you are a Washington" outsider"

-------

If you're white, win a beauty contest, attended 5-6 colleges before finally graduating, join the PTA, are voted to be mayor by 1000 people, govern a sparsely populated state for a almost two years now, and randomly get chosen at the last minute to be VP…you've "lived the American dream".

But if you're black, raised by a single mother, lived on food stamps, help the community, get into Harvard, become the first black editor of the Harvard Law Review, and are voted to be the presidential nominee by millions of people, you are just "uppity".

-----

If you live in an urban area and you get a girl pregnant, you're a "baby daddy."
If you're the same in Alaska, you're a "teen father."

-----

Black teen pregnancy? A "crisis" in America.
White teen pregnancy? A "blessed event."
------

If you name your kid "Barack", you're "unpatriotic."
If you name your kid "Track", you're "colorful."

-----

If you say that for the "first time in my adult lifetime I'm really proud of my country" it makes you "unfit" to be First Lady.
If you are a registered member of a fringe political group that advocates secession that makes you fit to be "First Dude."

-----

If you're a man and you decide to run for office despite your wife's re-occurrence of cancer you're a "questionable spouse."
If you're a woman and you decide to run for office despite having five kids including a pregnant 17-year old and a newborn with Downs Syndrome THAT'S NOT A FAIR QUESTION TO ASK.

-----

If you manage a multi-million dollar nationwide campaign, you are an "empty suit".
If you are a part time mayor of a town of 7000 people, you are an "experienced executive".

------

If you cheated on your first wife with an heiress, you're a Christian.
If you have been married to the same woman with whom you've been wed to for 19 years and raising 2 beautiful daughters with, you're "risky".

-----

If you are biracial and born in a state not connected to the lower 48, America needs darn near 2 years and 3 major speeches to "get to know you."
If you're white and from a state not connected to the lower 48, America needs 36 minutes and 38 seconds worth of an acceptance speech to know you're "one of us."

-----------

If you're 18, white, and get a 16 year old girl pregnant "life happens."
If you're 18, black, and impregnate a 16 year old girl, you're a "registered sex offender."

-------

If you're a Republican you think women should vote for a female candidate because you share the same biology, regardless of her stand on issues.
If you're a Democrat and you vote for a woman who shares your ideology, you're "playing the gender card."

-----------

If you're Chelsea Clinton, the right-wing press calls you "First dog."
If you're Bristol Palin, the right-wing press calls you "beautiful" and "courageous."

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home