Amazing dexterity! I was at the hardware store yesterday, inquiring about a replacement light bulb...one of those ring-shaped ones. As the not-unattractive young man who was assisting me took one box from the rack, two others fell in rapid succession, and he caught them - BAM! BAM! - with one hand. My reaction: Damn.
Unmitigated gall! Dan and I were at a Chinese restaurant not far from another pair of diners, one of whom was loud and rude. Dan whispered to me, "I haven't even seen him and I know he's in sales." As we were paying the bill and getting ready to leave, the suspected salesman starts up a shockingly racist imitation of Chinese people, in the same loud tone of voice that I am sure the staff heard. My reaction: Douchebag!
Fashion flogging! During my normal morning walk, I pass a drycleaning shop that always features a lovely wedding gown, on a dressform, in the window. This morning that dress (and its form) were on the sidewalk, being beaten with a flyswatter wielded by a man I assume was the owner. He was no doubt beating out dust, but in my head I kept hearing, "Bad bride! Bad, bad bride!" My reaction: Hit harder!
4 comments:
Did I ever tell you the time I was sitting next to someone being a loud asshole in a Chinese restaurant, and it turned out to be Paulie Shore? True story.
I wish more stories ended up with the words "and it turned out to be Paulie Shore."
I'm guessing the salesman dined on Moo Shoo Spit?
Unfortunately, the douchebag was smart enough to finish eating before he took his trip down Racist Lane.
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